Southern Living They just opened a new Starbucks up the street from me. It's the first one they've built here (not including the B&N Cafe). It's a totally different experience than what I used to encounter in Chicago. First of all, any Starbucks in Chicago was always packed with people who went there NOT for the coffee. I mean there were 12 year olds up in there ordering brownies and Frappuchinos! Kids would hang out there on Friday nights taking up all of the couches and chairs! Secondly, you'd place your order, it'd get shouted out to the barista, and it'd come up 10 minutes later. You'd be lucky if you got a smile.
Now the one here...that's another story.
You walk into this Starbucks and it's quiet...all you hear is the clanging and hissing of the coffee maker. And people are actually ordering COFFEE. (Not a kid in sight, by the way). The cashier chats to me about the weather and tells me how good that lemon and ginger scone tastes. The barista hands me my cup in a record 2 minutes and even asks me:
"You want whip cream on that sweetie?"
Today, I went to European Touch (it's a spa...they do all sorts of things there...don't ask) and as I am waiting in the reception area, I suddenly feel like I am in the movie "Steel Magnolias". I am no longer at Eurpean Touch but Trubea's! Capri pants, bright crisp white and red shirts, sandles, 40 red toenails, and straw purses were in full effect today.
"Honey, Melissa is getting your room ready...she'll be right with you."
"Hey Shelby? You gonna order up some more of that salad we got yesterday?"
"Are ya'll heading out to the beach this weekend? It sure is nice outside today. Did you hear that storm last night?"
"Well I'll be Weezer! I haven't seen you at the Club lately! How is Philip? Are you running for president again?"
Winnie the Pooh Boo-Hoo (I'm in a silly mood and totally blogged out this week...)
I'm mad. I'm really pissed. I don't get it. Why do people steal shit at work?
Staplers Calculators Pens Pencils
Lunch Leftovers?
Winnie the Pooh Clocks?
Somebody stole my Winnie the Pooh clock from my desk at work! Talk about pissed! Why did it have to be that clock! Why didn't they steal the money I had in a container on my desk? They had to go and take my damn Pooh clock.
A few months before, someone stole my ice cream bars I brought from home. Weeks before that, someone stole my lunch leftovers.
Where everyone doesn't work at a snails pace and everybody's afraid of the term "laid back".
Do I need to go back to the freezing cold?
Where you don't look at the people you sit next to on the train...unless they are doing something amusing-like tap dancing, or reciting poetry out loud to an invisible arena.
Do I need to go back to former playground?
Where on any given night, you can drive downtown and actually find something to do.
Do I really belong here...or should I go back to that place?
Where sandles aren't worn to the office and female agression is perceived as
Critics Take: "AP2 is sometimes funny, almost always outrageous and somewhat ineptly filmed."
My Take: Glad I waited for the DVD. Just another horny, suburban-white-kid-trying-desperately-to-get-laid flick. I wanted to take the "Like this one time...at band camp" girl's flute and shove it up her ass.
Best Scene: When I pushed the eject button on the DVD player
Rock Star
Critics Take: "It's intermittently flashy cool (but usually plays it for campy laughs), tries to touch on some serious emotions (but comes off like a weak metal ballad) and, in the end, feels a little pointless."
My Take: Marky Mark playing a rock star! I liked this movie. It was stupid, but entertaining. So what if Jennifer Aniston sucked in the movie? Mark Wahlberg made up for it.
Best Scene: Ummm, it was when the credits were rolling...an out take shows Mark Wahlberg preparing to rehearse for a scene in Rock Star when "Good Vibrations" comes busting out over the sound system. What does he do? Flashes back to the days when The Fresh Price was still "The Fresh Prince" and busts out in complete running man mode.
The Score
The Critics Take: "It's a fun, simply directed heist picture that's smart enough, darkly stylish enough and suspenseful enough to keep you very satisfied."
My Take: Yawn....a movie directed by the voice of Miss Piggy? What ever happened to the body Ed Norton had in American History X??!!
Best Scene: When Angela Bassett had more than a 2 minute appearance in the movie!
All The Pretty Horses
The Critics Take: "All The Pretty Horses is at its best when focusing on the dusty details of the ranchers' hard existence. Barry Markowitz's cinematography and Ted Tally's script (based on Cormac McCarthy's much-loved novel) capture a sweet and melancholy flavor in depicting a way of life that seemed long since lost even while a hardy few were still living it."
My Take: Who was in this movie? Was it about pretty horses? I wouldn't know. I popped it out of the DVD player after 20 minutes.
Best Part: Was that Elliot from ET?
The Gift
The Critics Take: "Oscar-land here. Written by Billy Bob Thornton and starring former winners and nominees alike."
My Take: Very cool movie...although I had never heard of it before. Kate Blanchett and Keanu Reeves both pull off great country accents.
Best Scene: Giovanni Ribisi beating the shit out of Keanu Reeves' truck then running up to the gun Reeves held in his hand yelling "Shoot me!" Great portrayal of a crazy muthafucka.
Definition: The lack of discrimination or selectivity, esp. having a number of sexual partners
Example: Kim's extreme promiscuity lead to 3 unplanned pregnancies; each by a different baby-daddy.
Pregancies can be prevented, but why is it cheaper for men to have sex than it is for women? Why does a female condom cost more? Why does the female have to provide lubricant? Why the hell does a pack of BCP's cost so damn much?
Of course there are alternatives...the choice is yours.
K-Y Personal Lubricant (4 oz.) $3.99 Water: Free Cons of K-Y: None
Lifestyles Ultra Sensitive Condoms (12 pack): $5.99 Withdrawal Method: Free Cons of the condom: "Oops." The muthafucka might break.
Sheer Glyde Strawberry Dental Dam (3 pack): $6.99 Plastic Grocery Bags: Free Cons of the detal dam: Tastes great, less fulfilling.
Female Condom (5 pack) $14.99 Withdrawal Method: Free Cons of the condom: Not knowing how to use the big ass thing.
First Response One Step Pregnancy Test (2 pack): $16.99 Calendar: Free Cons of the test: Having to hear the words, "Are you sure it's mine?"
Ortho Try-Cyclen (1 pack): $22.00 Abstinence: Free Cons of the pill: Weight-gain, increased breast size, moodiness, bitchiness
Definition: Unduly interested in the affairs of others
Example: Blog surfing has become the new inquisitorial pastime for those bored at work.
Enter the life of me...Wendy. I get over 15 hits a day by the "inquisitors". I have regular inquisitors (those who look at my blog everyday)...sometimes 3 times a day.
What is it about blogs that are appealling to the viewer?
Is it a way to get to know a person without physical interaction?
Is it a way to get answers to questions you were afraid to ask that person?
Is it being a snoop? Is it being nosey?
Or is it a way to learn about that person anonymously?
Today on the phone with Jennifer: "I think my ex-sorrysonoffrancine's old lady might have seen my blog. I mean...why would she be so interested in my life? She's the last person I would've expected to be interested in me. Would you look at Christopher's ex-girlfriend's blog if she had one?"
"Yeah!"
"But why? I don't understand? What do you care about her?"
"I just think it's a way of finding out your personality and what attracted your ex to you. I don't know. I'd do it just out of curiousity."
I don't know a damn thing about my ex's old lady. I actually met her in 1999 at his company picnic (she was his boss). But other than a few emails she sent to him and a note I found that she sent to him through intra-office mail...I know nothing about her (well, I take that back...she likes football).
But the point is...I don't care to know anything about her.
If she is looking at my blog on a daily basis, I'm curious as to why? If it's to learn more about me, save your time and go to the secondary source: YOUR MAN. He knows me like a book. Fuck a blog.
Message: Boney James is coming to Charlotte on 3/12 and to Durham on 3/26. Not sure how you feel about Boney...but let me know. Oh yeah, this is not a girls only venture!
To: Wendy
Subject: Reply to BJ
Message: Who is Boney James? Is he one of those Atlanta strippers?
