That there are tons of cat litter, cat food, dog food, and human society ad in Redbook, Family Circle, Rosie, and Better Homes and Gardens? But you don't see one single pet ad in Essence, Honey, or Ebony. Does the old cat lady myth only apply to white women?
I think SO!
How everybody is having a baby or wanting a baby on TV? First Rachel on "Friends", then Grace on "Will & Grace". You don't see anyone on "Girlfriends" or "Soul Food" getting pregnant by their ex-boyfriend or wanting to conceive a child with their gay roommate. Does the I-Want-To-Have-A-Baby-Now-Before-I-Get-Old myth only apply to white women?
I finally got a North Carolina drivers license. For the first time since 1989, I have a license issued in a state other than Indiana.
So what took so long?
First of all, I didn't feel like studying for a test. In order to get a drivers license in the state of North Carolina, you have to pass the vision, road sign, and written test. So I printed out the handbook from the internet and read through it the night before I went to the DMV. I'm kinda glad I did.
After sitting down at the station, providing all of my information to the DMV guy, and convincing him that I was indeed African-American (seriously, I flashed him my sorority financial card...that helped, some..."good choice" the man told me) I proceeded to the vision test. Passed that with flying colors.
The sign test? A breeze, well...sort of. You have to guess the name of 11 signs by their shapes. I didn't get the "No Passing Zone" sign. Like I see the shape of that sign all the time...
Next was the written test. This was kinda cool because you sit at a computer screen with earphones on and a picture comes up on the screen with the question below it. You tap the letter of the correct answer on the screen. You can even pass the question and come back later. Plus it even keeps a tally of your score.
So I dive in...hoping I get all of them correct, and not have to worry about coming back the next day if I miss 6 of the questions.
Question #1: The percentage of highway deaths caused by drunken persons is about:
A. 10% B. 25% C. 38% D. 67%
That's easy. I memorized that percentage. C-38%.
Question #2. Conviction for which of the following carries the highest number of points?
A. reckless driving B. hit and run with property damage C. driving without a license D. passing a stopped school bus that is unloading children
Again, a memorized answer. D-passing a stopped school bus that is unloading children. You get 5 points for that.
Question #3: Why should you repair a leaky exhust pipe?
A. because it wastes gas and oil B. because it allows poisonus gas to enter the car C. because it caused wear on the vehicle
What in the???
What the hell does this have to do with the driving laws in the state of North Carolina???
(I missed this question...along with every other question that had to do with car maintenance. Why the hell do I need to know how to take care of my car in order to have a drivers license? That is what Midas is for!)
Anyway, I ended up missing 4 questions, but I was still able to get my license. I may not know how to take care of my car, but at least I know how to drive!
I've been having this constant craving for chocolate lately. I crave everything right now from chocolate men to chocolate shakes. One thing I can say is that I am addicted to chocolate shakes. I had one for lunch and am sitting here all bloated and big...feeling like Veruka from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. I am about to burst. That's what an addiction can do to you. It can make you sick. I'm feeling sick and sleepy right about now.
I need to go to Willy Wonka's de-juicer.
Oh, and the addiction to chocolate men? That's even worse. I like the dark chocolate. I used to like milk chocolate, but they were too sweet for me. Too tame. Dark chocolate is the best. Dark chocolate with dazzing white teeth.
Brandy's new CD is actually pretty good. Ashanti ain't got shit on Brandy!
"Ali" is a long ass movie. Ali was one of the original rappers. He would break out in rhymes all the time. So is it fitting that Will Smith portrayed him?
"O" was a dumb ass movie. A white teenage movie looped with ghetto rap music. Thumbs down to the marketing guru behind this piece of trash movie.
Lisa Bonet is a sellout. How dare she refuse to do a Cosby reunion!
Amahd Rashad is gay. Did you see the peach suit he was wearing today? Why else would he wear a peach suit? He's gay I tell you!
Shaq is a big ass freak. He really didn't hurt himself on Sunday while cleaning his house. You know he got hurt doing some freaky shit.
North Carolina is a boring ass state. If someone can find some cool shit to do here...let me know.
