I spent the past two days at a very eclectic venue with the sole purpose of brainstorming with my category group from work. Our chariot was a burgandy bus/van hybrid with airconditioning that took about 2 hours to kick in. Throw in a driver with unsteady hands named Roy, and you've got yourself a ride from hell. It took us 6 hours to get to Play. Roy decided to take the back roads to Virginia...as if the bus/van hybrid would burst into flames if it hit the pavement of an interstate. Nevertheless, a few pit stops along the way at places with names such as Stew's Hide-A-Way that sold earthworms in the same refrigerator section as sausage and whipped cream...and you could pick up so Deer Detergent on your way out to give your clothes that fresh-gamey scent.
So finally, after 6 hours of swerving and sweat...we made it to play.
I never knew you could spend 2 days talking and dreaming up ideas for underwear!!!!
I spent the past two days at a very eclectic venue with the sole purpose of brainstorming with my category group from work. Our chariot was a burgandy bus/van hybrid with airconditioning that took about 2 hours to kick in. Throw in a driver with unsteady hands named Roy, and you've got yourself a ride from hell. It took us 6 hours to get to Play. Roy decided to take the back roads to Virginia...as if the bus/van hybrid would burst into flames if it hit the pavement of an interstate. Nevertheless, a few pit stops along the way at places with names such as Stew's Hide-A-Way that sold earthworms in the same refrigerator section as sausage and whipped cream...and you could pick up so Deer Detergent on your way out to give your clothes that fresh-gamey scent.
I spent the past two days at a very eclectic venue with the sole purpose of brainstorming with my category group from work. Our chariot was a burgandy bus/van hybrid with airconditioning that took about 2 hours to kick in. Throw in a driver with unsteady hands named Roy, and you've got yourself a ride from hell. It took us 6 hours to get to Play. Roy decided to take the back roads to Virginia...as if the bus/van hybrid would burst into flames if it hit the pavement of an interstate. Nevertheless, a few pit stops along the way at places with names such as Stew's Hide-A-Way that sold earthworms in the same refrigerator section as sausage and whipped cream...and you could pick up so Deer Detergent on your way out to give your clothes that fresh-gamey scent.
Scooby-Doo sucked. It was not my choice of movie for the evening, but my "little sister" wanted to see it so I had to oblige. So I go pick the little girl up from a house with a driveway that's always filled with 6 vehicles (and it's only a 3 bedroom house) and off to the movies we go.
After stocking up on Sprite and overpriced burnt popcorn, we head toward the theater.
"Y'all going to see Dooby-Scoo?" Salty boy takes my ticket, rips it in half, and hands it back. Maybe he can't read, and I didn't want him to make the same mistake twice, so I politely answered, "No, we're going to see Scooby-Doo. Who is Dooby-Scoo?" His buddly snickers as Salty boy points to the theater and says, "Enjoy the scoovie."
Let me just say a few things about the movie and Scooby Doo in general:
- The movie sucked. The cartoon is better. At least the cast was diversified. I think the Harlem Globtrotters were on there a few times.
- Scooby was creepy as an animation in a movie. To make matters worse, they brought back Scrappy Doo in the movie and claimed he wasn't a puppy but a dog with a hormone disorder.
- Shaggy was nasty and farted so much that it wasn't even funny. And he is odd because his best pal is a dog.
- I think Velma is a boy. I think she was diggin Daphne. She was wearing that orange turtleneck to hide her adams apple.
- Daphne is a ho.
- Fred is gay. Daphne and Fred never got together. What's wrong with them?
I didn't know what the hell to do! I'm not used to seeing animals creep up onto my doorstep, spiders roaming my garage, or birds trying to fight over my grass seed.
This damn snake was cold chilling on my porch, right in front of my door. It didn't move for 10 minutes. Actually, it looked like it was dead...and curled up, but facing my front door. Picture 3 women standing around a teeny-tiny snake screaming every time it moved.
The thing was the size of a No. 2 pencil, but I wasn't about to go out there and mess with the thing. I was beginning to think apartment living wasn't so bad after all...
I got Stephen on the phone and begged him to come to my house and make the damn thing go away. (Note: Stephen is the only man I know that lives on this side of town...he only lives a minute away...although I could've called the 80 year old man across the street, but he can't bend over too well).
I go outside and wait for Stephen when I hear..."It's going towards the driveway!" I run into my friend Jackie's car and shut the door. She's looking at me like I'm crazy because here she is at my house with her boots on and her shovel filled with Sulfer trying to help me kill the damn snake. And I run to her car and slam the door...and leave Jackie in the front yard by herself. All the while my other friend Shirley is peeking being the curtains inside the house keeping lookout on the snake. She's studying to be a surgeon. I thought she had no fear!
Stephen shows up a few minutes later and walks up the driveway. I know Janeen (Stephen's wife) was probably thinking when he left, "Now what's going on? Last week you had to go catch a bug in a car, now a snake? Do I need to rent my husband out for critter control?"
Stephen caught the snake in a plastic Harris Teeter bag, tied up the top, and bid us farewell. It was as simple as that. He later tells me that he gave it to a Sheriff he saw on duty.
